Tuesday 31 August 2010

Talk Radio (www.wcmt.org.uk)

After a long drive, I arrived at the radio station where I was going to take part in Brother Bey’s ‘Breaking the Cycle’, a talk radio platform for ex-offenders. Brother Bey is powerful, controversial, and very much in control of both the mixing desk and his callers. The topic for discussion is about the role of academics in terms of solving problems for ex-offenders. Brother Bey’s caller reaffirms his views and commitment to their cause. This provides the contrast for his views that argue that academics per se are not at fault, but the system that excludes and bars access to meaningful services for those who have been incarcerated. Each caller has a story to tell, combined with some imparted wisdom to leave other listeners with. Brother’s Bey’s nephew delivers two powerful raps, whilst others debate and question each other’s points of view. As I sit here waiting to be interviewed I feel quite nervous as the subject matter and tone of the debate is not light listening. The callers have serious experiences and I’m here to address some pressing issues that Brother Bey wants answers to.

Brother Bey tells me he has little interest in my academic studies and has invited me on the show to discuss my work in prison and community. I feel passionate about what I’m doing and where I meander off into my own brand of rhetoric, Brother Bey reigns me in, by quoting Malcolm ‘X’, who said ‘Make it plain’. When I didn’t make it plain, I was quickly corrected. Even though the time went quick I realised that this medium was one of the few avenues that ex-offenders had to both air their views, as well as having some of their pain validated by a host who not only understood their pain, but has guided it to a new position of healing numerous times. I felt good that I could be of some assistance, but I also realised that my presence was a mere token gesture. I left the show pleased with my input, and saw the potential of using talk radio in a context that would suit the type of work I’m currently doing. Yet again another learning experience.

Peace

Monday 30 August 2010

Community Connections (www.wcmt.org.uk)

Today I attended a very unique meeting. President Obama’s, Director of the White House’s National Drug control policy; R.Gil Kerlikowske was invited to address the East Baltimore Drug Free Coalition. The coalition consisted of a range of community people, strategic players, and local political officials. A variety of presentations took place from various community representatives sharing their experiences of, and responses to, the issue of drugs in the community. What struck me was the sheer absence of men from the community, which was the opposite in terms of political representatives, who were predominantly men. Each speaker had a different story to tell, some tragic, others challenging, all underpinned with an air of optimism. Erich March, a funeral director talked about the impact of burying young people had on the community he loved. His speech was moving, passionate, and tinged with sadness. The young people who spoke were very inspiring and called for the elders in the community to enable them to flourish. Key issues that emerged were:

1. The need for social marketing around community drug message promotion.
2. The key issue facing communities is a need for environmental change
3. Increased access to meaningful employment.
4. The problem should be rooted within a public health agenda

President Obama’s representative talked about the need to switch the lens for addressing drugs in the community, from a one of criminal justice, to more of a treatment agenda. The sheer weight of the problems the community was facing was frightening and begged a question; treatment agenda or criminal justice; can the underlying issues that create drug culture really be addressed via political means? It reminded me that in the US, there is not the level of local democracy we have in the UK, hence the community has to take care of itself. Access to treatment, resources, healthcare, education, and so on are all things in the UK we take for granted. Here in Baltimore, nothing can be taken for granted. I left the meeting with a very clear thought about what need to happen both here and in the UK. Communities need to own their own research agenda, and provide steer to be researched with as opposed to being researched on. Knowledge is power. Those who have the insights coming from the outcomes of research are in a much more powerful position than those who don’t. Owning and controlling the means of production and distribution of your own identifiable needs has to be a core priority for communities if they are to survive in diminishing resource environment.

Peace

Friday 27 August 2010

In conversation with (www.wcmt.org.uk)

Brother Bey:
Brother Bey is a 60 year old African American man, father, and ex-offender, who runs his own organization called F.O.X.O. (Fraternal Order of Ex Offenders). He is wise, assertive, and a no nonsense talking individual who believes passionately that ex-offenders should be more involved in solving problems associated with recidivism, desistance, and a whole a range of criminal justice issues. His passion comes across is every syllable. He doesn’t mince words or waste them. Each statement is clearly articulated within a context that makes his arguments compelling. Brother Bey talks to me openly about his life, poor choices, the death of his son, and his philosophy about society in general. He makes it clear that he is not a victim, but was a willing participant in crime, that informs his current position as an advocate for ex-offenders. Brother Bey has many convincing arguments that are put in front of me with the speed of a racing car. I can also see where the potential conflict with his desire for academia to recognize his position arises. Universities are places of safety, hoarding ideas, and generating data that at times sits on shelves. Brother Bey wants to liberate this material and place it in the hands of those who can not only utilize the recommendations, but play a significant role in its implementation. Brother Bey reminds me about the UK situation and how my own desire to see more ex-offenders involved in designing and delivering programmes with disaffected youth can be thwarted by bureaucracy or plain fear. Brother Bey strengthens my argument for the development of a holistic space and dialogue where the academy, strategic players, and community are unified to bring about real and meaningful change

Jill:
Jill is an African American woman, mother of three children, who works at Johns Hopkins University. Her reflections of parenting are compelling. In discussion it is clear that she is a devoted single mother, who has some real concerns about the future of her children. Interestingly enough, her views centre not on a mother with young children, but more about parenting at a time when they are old enough to fend for themselves. She describes how her children have been kept away from the streets and are quite spoilt. However, she starts to feel awkward at the prospect of them having to engage with the streets without the right preparation. I talk to her about how she can break down some of the issues and repackage them to her children who are quite formed in their opinions and view of the world. Jill tells me that a lot of the materials available are formulaic, predictable, and at times not parent centred or friendly. As a parent myself I hear and feel the anxiety of the struggle we have in terms of ‘letting go’. Jill made me think about my own battles with dealing with older children. On the one hand we want them to get older, leave us, and find their own way in life. On the other we fear for their future and still want to maintain some level of control over how they journey through the difficulties’ in life. Jill’s conversation highlighted the need for the development of resources that are creative, innovative, and driven by parental need. As parents we are all like Jill. We want the best for our children, don’t want them to make the same mistakes as us, and more importantly we want to see them escape the pitfalls and problems we encountered. Modern living, the need to earn a living, and trying to survive in difficult circumstances robs many of us of the time required to do that job properly. I think of my mum. She did a good job, stayed with us throughout our growing years, was always available, and loved without judgment. It takes common sense, but as I know, sense is never common.

Phil:
Phil is an academic who cares passionately for the community in which he is firmly attached. Phil is a workhorse who is dependable, loyal, and is very insightful. He is a mover, shaker, and someone who is incredibly well networked. Phil occupies an uncomfortable space. Inasmuch as he is paid individual in Johns Hopkins University, where community at times is absent. He is also very active in trying to ensure the community has a voice in forums designed to affect some level of change. A very difficult and demanding job that at times can split loyalties and create its own stresses. I learn from Phil that you can’t be all things to all people, but you must be true to your own values and beliefs. In conversation with Phil I begin to see how I myself must address some of my own misgivings about the vested interests for my work and services. Like Phil I have tried to serve many different interests and at times succeeded. But most of the time the failure has been serving the needs of others, as opposed to the issue I’m representing. Phil challenged me on many levels. One of the most important areas that I was confronted with is in ‘How do you bring your ideas to fruition?’ Many of us have great ideas, can make them sound wonderful, and all appear to be exactly what is required. However, If the resources, systems, methodology, or implementation strategies are flawed, then what do we do. At the core of a lot of what I do is in the process of evaluation. What I’m learning from Phil, is there are many different type of evaluation as there are types of ideas. Phil forces me to confront something fundamental, how will bring about the changes I speak about in a rhetorical way? In conclusion more time must be spent on deliverable outcomes that are not only achievable but sustainable. Clearly a lot of food for thought.

Peace

Thursday 26 August 2010

Court House (www.wcmt.org.uk)

Went down town Baltimore today. The buildings were great, the hive of activity was bustling, and I saw the biigest Barnes and Noble bookstore I'd ever seen. Downtown Baltimore means being next to the Harbour, a spectacular assortment of commerce and tourism. After buying a new book I decided to explore the city. Shops, offices, food places, all neatly wrapped around a stunning skyline. Then suddenly I stumbled across a beautiful but daunting building, the court house. Reporters lined the steps, and a strike force of custody officers waited to escort those just sentenced to prison. Then there it was, a large White van filled with about a dozen African Amercan men, being driven away. I felt sad. Making my way back to the waterfront I saw a few people begging, lying on the floor, and those huddled in shop doorways. The contrast between rich, poor, black, white is stark. You can almost miss it if you don't look hard enough. I paused for a moment to reflect on what I'd just seen and then ventured into the biggest African American musuem in Baltimore. I didn't know whether it was a lesson from history or a history lesson. Whatever it was, the small amount of people trawling around this beautiful building would suggest it's more of a tourist attraction, as opposed to a place to learn about not repeating mistakes of the past. Once again another challenging day. In saying that I had a light bulb moment and have started the development of a parents resource that I will be wanting to bring to fruition on my return. My Baltimore mentor David, keeps pushing me on the issue of social concern combined with business, as a viable way of addressing issues ethically, combined with making some money. Another powerful day.

Peace

Wednesday 25 August 2010

Community Engagement (www.wcmt.org.uk)

Attended a meeting with the Baltimore City Schools director, community organisations, and Johns Hopkins. The meeting centred around community intervention programmes for high risk schools, who young people are experiencing some serious social problems. It was similar to discussions in the UK, however the presence of Johns Hopkin's made a big difference. I made a few inputs and felt comfortable with my sharing and level of understanding of the issues being discussed. The recurring themes were lack of monies, communities not feeling empowered by commissioning bodies, the absence of a coordinated approach to addressing the issues young people face. Many thoughts came to mind. Namely, why is there no transatlantic link that would connect us in the UK to those in the US, where there would be mutually agreed objectives for real partnership working. When asking that question, the response was simply, no-one has really brought it to fruition. Not that it can't or won;t be done. It just requires proper coordination.

On leaving the meeting I was introduced to Professor Sheppard Kellam, who was a founder member of the mental health department in Johns Hopkins that deals with young people and violence. His insights, passion, and understanding of the issues was overwhelming. Here is a guy who has conducted significant research studies, still based at the university, who gave me some of his time. He presented me with a journal of a major piece of research he and his colleagues had conducted over many years and suggested I study it as part of my own awareness of the international context for some of my own work. After about an hour I had to leave Professor Kellam who had other appointments. I thanked him and went on my way.

In conclusion, the sheer numbers of those men in Baltimore who have been arrested, incarcerated, died, have joined gangs, and so on, brought me to another realisation. How is the impact of the loss of such a large volume of men managed by the families and communities who are left behind?

As I reflect on my work on manhood, masculinity, with an emphasis on fatherhood, I realise that the journey may be long, but I'm actually on the right track.

Peace

Tuesday 24 August 2010

Community media (www.wcmt.org.uk)

21/8/10

Scraping the froth off of the deluge of glossy American TV, I'm captivated by something more significant; community media. I have gained valuable insights into the diversity of activities and approaches to looking at, engaging with, and solving some of the ongoing community issues here in Baltimore. Whereas, the big players on American TV go for ratings, advertising revenue, and project a class divide culture in televison advertising and marketing, community broadcasting gives voice to the fundamental need for communities tio be heard. Health, arts, enterprise, education, criminal justice issues, interegenerational, mental health, and so on are all solid platforms by which sections of the Baltimore community can find space to voice their issues in their own way. One such revelation was the Digital Youth Network. An excellent idea that sees the intersection of education and technology as both a tool for empowerment and innovation for young people in Baltimore. Another significant facet of community engagement in Baltimore is talk radio. Many of the issues that are skirted over on TV are addressed fully and comprehensively on talk radio. Observing community based media approaches such as this highlights a very powerful way communities can have a voice and liberate themselves from social and cultural invisibility.

Today I found myself meeting with Phil Leaf (Director of Mental Health Service - Youth Violence prevention) at Johns Hopkins University. With such an awesome reputation It was daunting at first, but Phill made me feel welcome. We proceeded to discuss issues of mutual concern, as well as him giving me a wad of new contacts, meetings, and leads. He has also provided me with space in his department to work from. In listening to Phil's wisdom and insights, I am reminded of much this trip is a learning experience. The following wisdom story underpins where I feel my head has been and now needs to be.

Obstacles

In the village of Carifa the King had a large boulder placed on a roadway. He then hid himself and watched to see if anyone would remove the huge rock. Some of the king's wisest subjects came by and simply walked around it. Others just looked at it and walked back the way they came. Many cursed the King for not keeping the roads clear, but none of them did anything about getting the large boulder out of the way. Now Sankofa the wise man came along carrying a load of vegetables and upon approaching the large boulder tried to move it to the side of the road. After much pushing and shoving, he realised he would have to resort to a different approach. So he found a large piece of wood nearby, jammed it underneath the large boulder and moved it to one side. Sankofa then picked up his vegetables and was about to leave when he noticed a purse that contained many gold coins and a note from the King indicating that the gold was for the person who removed the boulder from the roadway. The King appeared and congratulated Sankofa for being wise enough to move it.

“Why did you remove the boulder Sankofa?” asked the King,

“Every obstacle presents us with an opportunity to improve things” Sankofa replied. He then took one gold coin and handed the rest back to the King.

“Greed is also an obstacle. Selling my vegetables will get me what I need”. Sankofa went on his way and left the King to ponder on what he had said.

As Sankofa wisely says 'Every obstacle is an opportunity to improve things'. Knowing how to remove them is one thing, what to do when they are removed in another. A big learning day.

Peace

Monday 23 August 2010

The trip (www.wcmt.org.uk)

16.08.2010
Woke up at 4am tired, nervous, combined with a strong sense of anticipation. It was when the taxi arrived at 5am I then realised there was no turning back. My Fellowship had well and truly begun. The journey from checking in, security check, and taking off was smooth and without a hitch. The months leading up to this moment have been fiilled with doubts, trepidation and questioning. Sitting on the plan I am feeling completely different. There is a strong sense that I'm going towards something and not moving away from something. Invariably this adventure will be a mixture of personal and professional and personal experiences that will fulfil a range of other vested interests. As I sit here writing I'm glad that I don't have my Black Berry and other distractons.I so much want to find me time that will provide me with much needed moments of calm and relaxation. This time last year I was quite ill and in need a change of pace and direction. The need to be reflective, creative and spiritual is ever present and will form the backdrop of how I must approach this trip. I would like to express a personal thanx to all of those people who have supported me in making this trip possible. Was relieved to be met by the Urban Leadership's director David Miller. A great guy, who was most welcoming. Accomodation is first class, an apartment in a listed building once occupied by Woodrow Wilson. Another plus.

First introduction to East and West Baltimore where most of the 'Wire' was filmed. At first I was excited as I remembered locations from the show. However, the sight of concrete, boarded up houses on mass, people standing around, juggling street runnings, brought back and unhappy reality check. Inner city deprivation at it's worse, going unseen by the vast majority of Baltimore's more affluent citizens. David took time to point out that there were a massive range of activities that are positive and productive coming out the city. What he wanted me to experience was the darker side of the city's landscape to get a sense of how his work is situated. I can see the parrallels with life in the UK. A powerful start.

17.08.2010
A very powerful day. First off we attended a meeting with David Miller and a Baltimore city council representative, Kevin Slayton. The discussion centred on a faith based response to engaging the community's fathers. The objective was to get to get the community actively engaged in looking at how the faith communities could be more active in enabling disconnected fathers to become more connected with their children. After that meeting had concluded, an ad-hoc conversation with a Baltimore police officer took place. We talked about many issues and compared the way police operate here and in the UK. An illuminating conversation. However, guns and their use dominated the conversation. A stark reminder of the difference in policing. They have guns, UK police don't. On the way to our next meeting David drove us across the city where the all too familar site of derelict houses, boarded up houses, and a deserted feel to streets was quite eerie. David reminded me that people lived in those spaces. I observed a community memorial where a young person had been shot. A draped sheet with signatures, combined with brandy bottles, accompanied with flowers, highlighted how the community responds to the violence on Baltimore's streets. Finnally, we ended up at an Obama funded fatherhood event in Washington DC. Sat in a couple of sessions, did some networking, before leaving to conclude the day at a nice Nigerian restaurant. A powerful day laced with some powerful insights and lessons.

19.08.10
Today was spent in David's company at the Urban Leadership Institute. He gave me some vlauable insights into how to turn community based ideas into business opportunities. Essentially this was a masterclass in social marketing, product development, fund raising, and occupying the market place. I attended a meeting with his publicist and observed how he manages his media work. Once again using other professionals to market him and his work reminded me of what should happen in the UK. This was followed by a visit to a black owned bank. Having a strong sense of public service combined with a signficiant business mindset underpinned David's success. It is also important to point out that David is a powerful public speaker, a well connected community person, and passionate about his work. Reflecting on the days events I was reminded how few resources there were for fathers in terms of things designed to improve the relationships with their children. Clarity emerges, as the trip begins to take form.

20.08.10
Today we went to visit black owned businesses; a soul food restaurant and a bookstore. Each one connected to the community, with a large constituency. What was very powerful in both cases was the sense of committment and service to the communities in which they served. Considering there were no grants avalable for running these type of business, you could see how running a social business can be both profitable and productive. Overall, another food for thought filled day. It was also the end of my first week. Time for a rest.

Sunday 15 August 2010

To be or not to be (www.wcmt.org.uk)

Today's thought is told through one of my favourite folktales.

Marcus was sitting with Sankofa the wise man.


'Sankofa, is it better to starve and be free or is it better to live life s a slave and have all the comforts in the world'  asked Marcus.

Sankofa smiled, and replied, 'A hungry wolf, which had been prowling through the forest in search of food, met a dog outside a farm gate.'

'You seem to be doing well. How do you keep so fat and sleek in wintertime? I am stronger than you, yet I am starving.' said the wolf.

'I earn my keep,' said the dog. 'I bark whenever strangers come to the gate, and at night I roam about the farm to keep away thieves. In return I get a snug kennel and food every day. The servants give me tidbits too, and sometimes my master throws me a bone from his own plate. It's a fine life. Why don't you try it?'

'I will indeed,' said the wolf. 'It seems I've been a fool to live so long in the snow and rain.' ‘So the two set off to the farmhouse together. As they went along the wolf noticed a sore place around the dog's neck and asked what it was.

'Oh, that is the mark of the chain they use to fasten me up in the daytime. They think I'm restless, and it's true I can't help tugging on it.' replied the dog

'But if you want to go somewhere, will they let you?' asked the wolf.

'Why, no,' said the dog. 'Not during the day.' finished the dog

'So that is the price you pay for your fine house and food!' exclaimed the wolf, and he turned and ran back into the forest.

Sankofa left Marcus to reflect on what he had said

Saturday 14 August 2010

Breaking it down (www.wcmt.org.uk)

Talking to a good friend of mine the other day I was asked an important question about my blog. Namely, who is the audience for my insights and reflections? Is it designed to be political, cultural, academic, creative, spiritual, and so on. Of course I don’t want to distance myself from any reader because the language or ideas expressed aren't relevant to the vast majority of readers. Nor do I want to talk down to anyone by presenting my views in a condescending and patronising way. I spent a good few hours reflecting on the posed question and went back to my work as a poet, writer, and director. I realised that the key to my blog is finding my own voice, of which I have many. Therefore, my blog will reflect the diversity of my opinions, thoughts, and ideas, expressed through the different voices I have.

Today’s reflection centres on a poem I wrote a long time ago. It was conceived when I worked in a range of environments and met very different men, all representing very different thoughts, ideas, and realities. It was this poem that enabled me to understand that masculinity and being a man was not a one size fits all. It was the catalyst that has underpinned my work in prisons, community, academia and more importantly in understanding who I was, who I am, and who I want to be in the future.

For men reading this poem I hope it will push you ask yourself a question …… Who am I?. For women reading this poem, I am hoping it will give you an insight into the diversity and complexities of men and how they define their masculinity. The poem is not rooted in any academic study. It is merely a reflection based on many observations over the years. There is no agenda or point I’m trying to make, other than enabling you to draw your own conclusions.  Enjoy ..................



Who am I?
I wear a designer suit ….carry a designer mobile, complete with a designer attitude and a designer way of life …I work off commission …. try to convince people I am a connoisseur of wine and sushi … I occasionally buy antiques to impress my friends and have shares in British Telecom as well as … dabbling on the stock market ..… I love my car more than my woman … who happens not only to be White … but Middle Class too … although I get vex when my sister dates a White man … I occasionally hit the woman I’m with, but my plastic smile and smooth way of talking usually fools them into thinking I’m cool … I have a degree as a passport out of the ghetto .. and my other Passport is used when I go skiing .. as it’s more fashionable than going to the Caribbean … In front of my White colleagues I condemn drugs, as I don’t want to be associated with anything which stops me getting promotion .. I then come home and smoke a big spliff …

Who am I ?
I have two mobiles …. a nine in my pocket .. an Uzi at home … I sell crack but don’t use … I have several gold teeth .. gold chains … gold bracelets … gold anything …… I drive a rental car … and make out I own it … I have more furniture in that car .. than my where I live … I have a licence to kill .. maim … hurt … without remorse …. and dress anyway I want to blend in with those I’m going to shoot … I tend to do whatever I want to because the community is generally scared of my reputation …. I need more than one gyal … and I certainly ain’t interested in contraception … I love taking risks and gambles .. sleep with one eye open .. and trust no-one … drown my misery with beats … I hate thinking if my woman’s being screwed by my mate … and can’t deal with not seein my kids .. I also can’t deal with having to see them .. but that’s dependent on which baby mother it is … I don’t like bein looked at .. talked about … laughed at … but I don’t mind givin weaker youts a beaten … society is scared of me, but loves to use my image on cop programmes …. I get depressed … can’t handle it sometimes .. and get looked down upon by my own community ….

Who am I?
I haven’t screwed without a condom … I haven’t screwed nuff gyal .. yet I’ve got HIV … I am not gay … and don’t have long to live .. … my friends and family have deserted me … the church won’t acknowledge who I am .. I am close to suicide and feel I am an innocent bystander who is the victim of a medical mistake

Who am I ?
I am well read .. know the right words … see myself as conscious … like to sound political …. I tell everyone who ain’t like me … to read more .. know more … get in touch with reality … I can quote Malcolm .. Franz Fanon …. the Koran …espouse radical politics .. behave like I’m a revolutionary .. knowing we ain’t living in Northern Ireland … so I don’t have to worry about being killed for my views…. I know my history … my politics … my relationship with society … but deep down I don’t believe the hype about Black Unity …where women are concerned .. I believe in their liberation providing I sanction it ….

Who am I ?
I sit on the fence .. have a White woman .. laugh at racist jokes …. feel a threat from other Black people .. I don’t really like Caribbean food .. well not in front of my White friends ..deep down I wish I wish I was White … well during the week … although I do like being Black at weekends … if you get my meaning …. I like having my hair straight .. and would kill for light skin .. and as for my nose .. come on … who wants something as broad as that … big lips .. I hate them… White people accept me for who I am coz like me .. they don’t see colour … coz we’re all the same … I’ve never experienced racism … not in front of my face that is … any my woman’s family .. it’s just name’s that’s all .. providing I drink my beer .. read the Sun .. and like football .. they like me

Who am I?
I feel my celebrity status makes me bigger than what I am … I am always seen in the right clubs.. grinning through my White teeth … I am desperate to go on TV and will play any part .. providing it pays well .. I don’t like playing roles made for White people but I will if it means I can be on TV. I never talk politics … express an opinion about anything related to the expression of radical ideas for fear of not getting that part … I am not insecure .. but I’m scared of failure … I know I am not liked by the establishment .. but I have to kiss ass .. otherwise I won’t eat or be able to put petrol in my seven series lifestyle … I used to be a wannabe who’s become a might be .. who is set to become a has been .. who might become a where are they now …

Who am I ?
I use lirical warfare as my means of liberation .. I have the uniform … the ammunition comes out my mouth … I hope to be independent …. But if I have to work for that White owned record company I will … because I don’t have the energy to set up my own thing … I struggle .. but only with my phrasing and beats …. I chat my politics coz I ain’t accountable for the belief system which comes out of my mouth .. I use African/American speech coz it sounds better although I think I’m an original … money ain’t gonna change me … even if I do move out the ghetto .. get a bigger car and a 6 album deal ….

Who am I ?
I am hard working … invisible in societies eyes … I don’t make headlines .. I look after my kids .. I go to work .. have a steady relationship .. I have no uniform … make no big gestures or statements

Who am I ?
I sit in a cell reflectin …. delvin … lookin back but never forward … I live with regrets .. try to forget .. smoke weed ..… I like my hip hop .. reggae … R and B … occasional spliff … a likkle drink … I’m opposed to Black on Black violence .. and don’t like crack dealers …. I haven’t broken the law .. or even have a car with central locking … my chest can’t stop a bullet … and I get tired if I stay out too late …. But I am invisible in the eyes of the media ..

Who am I ?

I am …. father …. less
….. community …… less
… emotion … less …
….mind ….. less
….. value … less …
… care … less ….
……. thought … less
….. conscious …. less
….. couldn’t care … less
…. Identity … less …

Who am I ?

Friday 13 August 2010

Breaking theFourth Wall - What is it? (www.wcmt.org.uk)

Today I woke up thinking about the title of my trip to Baltimore ‘Breaking the Fourth Wall’, and felt the need to give an explanation to those reading this blog who may need some clarification of its meaning:

What is the fourth wall?
The ‘Fourth Wall’ applies to the imaginary invisible wall at the front of the stage in a theatre where the audience sees the action in the world of the play. When an actor talks directly to the audience, they ‘Break the Fourth Wall’. In the context of my trip ‘Breaking the Fourth wall’ relates to the symbolic adaptation from its use in theatre into a sociological context. For me black men symbolise actors in a piece of on-going socio-drama where they act out roles, wear costumes, with a pre-determined plot, to a society who at times pushes some of them to the margins of society. The subsequent outcome is for some of those men to break the social norms and conventions where they in effect break ‘Societies Fourth Wall’. The net result is that many black men are labelled deviant and are then subsequently punished via incarceration in both prisons and mental institutions.

It is my firm belief that there is a need to develop holistic approaches that will address the core and not the symptoms of problems that hinders the positive development of black male self-concept. It is about creating a new paradigm that will enable black men to consider new choices that could divert them away from ‘risky lifestyles’, anti-social behaviour, and criminal activity. Engaging black men in processes that will liberate them from the pain of social neglect and denied access could play a significant role in taking them from a social position of being seen as a liability into the realms of being acknowledged as an asset to themselves, their families, and in turn the community.

It is time to develop alternative masculinities that are framed within a cultural and spiritual context that enables black men to the current levels of oppression, social exclusion, and denied access currently experienced by many of us. In trying to develop a stronger sense of being, black men must learn how to organise their world, make appropriate decisions, and create new meaning and purpose from the things that affect their lives. It is my view that the challenge for black men is to tell our own story and reframe our own narrative. In critical race theory this would be known as the 'counter narrative'.  Put simply the narrative of the oppressed is not the same as a the narrative of the oppressor.

The need to tell your story:
In every community stories are hold the key to memory and purpose. Everyone must participate and submerge themselves in myth and folklore to process the world around them, and make sense of it. Stories open up our world, boost imagination and give us self-knowledge. Without stories we cannot function adequately in understanding who we are and why we’re here. Stories bind people together and allow each individual to better comprehend what their place is in the world, and how their place holds everything else together.

Cultural knowledge is derived from stories that are templates for acquiring wisdom. Retelling our story provides opportunity not just for ‘self-reflection’ but scope for transforming into a ‘new constructed self'. When one analyses the current social positioning of black men within the UK and the US it is clear that there is very little outlet for articulating the trauma of historical misrepresentation, denied access, social exclusion, and disaffection. It is therefore right to assume that the re-telling of our stories as a counter narrative can serve as a conduit by which black men can speak to the world free from the oppressive conditions that shaped their position in it. It is also about building an important legacy that will challenging the dominant narrative that continues to distort, conceal, and hide the truth about black men and who we really are.

Thursday 12 August 2010

More reflections (www.wcmt.org.uk)

A few days to go and more reflections creep into my consciousness. I discovered recently that African American sociologist E. Franklin Frazier was born in Baltimore. His work has been very important to me in terms of my academic studies and raising my confidence in terms of grappling with the rigours of my PhD studies.

However, this morning I had a deeper questioning reverberating in my head. Namely, why are so many black scholars, historians, and thinkers absent from the wider public consciousness. W.E.B. Dubois published ‘Souls of Black Folk’ in 1938, E. Franklin Frazier published ‘the Black Bourgeoisie’ in 1936, and Ken Pryce published ‘Endless Pressure’ in 1979. Yet in 2010 we have an overrepresentation of black men languishing prisons, an increase in the numbers of black men in both care, mental health institutions, and gang affiliation, combined with an ever increasing deterioration of the current social positioning of young black men in education and employment. What is both disappointing and disheartening is how the wisdom, insights, and lessons to be learned from the previously mentioned writers are largely absent in the hearts and minds of the community I reside. Dubois’s work the subject of much debate and speculation demonstrated his unswerving commitment to responding to the plights of black people in the US as a social commentator, as well as playing a major role in answering key questions concerning black criminality in his role as a sociologist.

E. Franklin Frazier’s attack on the black middle classes although written from an African American perspective, is prophetic as black Britons are following close behind the asssertions made in his book. Ironically, Frazier’s work, in spite of being a key figure in US sociology has been written out of the current criminological discourses. An indictment of epic proportions. We then come to Ken Pryce, a sociologist from Trinidad, who based himself in St Pauls, in Bristol for a period of 4 years, where his use of participant observation of that community gave one of the most telling and ‘insider’ views of Britain’s black community, in the last 40 years. In spite of the age of his work, Pryce’s work could have been written in 2010. His insights, understandings, and detailed observations demonstrate that little has changed since he was around.

These books highlight a possible covert conspiracy to disjoint the black community from finding solutions to its mounting problems. It also highlights how complacent, apathetic, and ignorant many people in the community are, in regards to the valuable contribution of black scholars in unpacking the complexities of black social life in the UK. Instead we have become characters in a narrative written by those who have little understanding of the journey travelled by most of us. Several questions emerge; ‘will my work be destined to the shelves of a charity shop (where I found Pryce’s book), Amazon, the library basement, or placed in the hands of a community activist who will bring it out during heated debates during black history month. Reading the works of Dubois, Frazier, and Pryce, I am saddended why much of the work written by black scholars has been rendered invisible in textbooks, screens, and airwaves. It is now down to those of us who have remained silent or have been silenced to expose the conspiracy, or try and infuse future generations with a passion for investigation of the past, as a way of navigating and negotiating the future.

Wednesday 11 August 2010

Where did it start? (www.wcmt.org.uk)

I became involved with prison work in the early 1980s and came from a background of activism. A fellow activist once told me, ‘if you wanted to do real activism work with black people you needed to start with the prison because that’s where most of us were. I started writing to prisoners and then began setting up arts-based residencies in prisons. The turning point came in the mid-eighties when he was asked to run a residency with a group of black prisoners in Long Lartin, a Category ‘A’ prison in Evesham.

Although I hadn’t gone to prisons to deal with the arts but rather ‘to engage black men’, this residency introduced me to the need for transformative experiences for black men in prison and the role of the arts in providing these. ‘It started off as a discussion around black history, black politics, and revolutionary theories and then translated into them expressing and exploring themselves through creativity. So for the first time, black men felt a sense of freedom, felt their experiences were being validated… for guys who couldn’t read or write, poetry and performance became a vehicle for them to explore who they were.

The next milestone in my work with black prisoners came when the late Anne Peaker suggested that I use the Unit (later named the Anne Peaker Centre) to articulate the voice of black prisoners. With a group of artists, I developed and delivered a project called Nuff Respect, which looked at the creative and rehabilitative needs of black prisoners. Over the following years I regularly delivered projects specifically for black prisoners through the Anne Peaker Centre and the National Black Prisoners Support Project.

My workshop approach would involve group bonding, the participatory definition of a brief, providing an inventory of creative workshops, teaching from a point of prior knowledge (so that poetry can begin with hip hop and grime) and teaching by example. Driven by the possibilities of engagement and transformation, I adapted his approach in each situation to maximise these possibilities. ‘I didn’t have a methodology, I just knew that I was engaging black men and whatever I was doing was working. There was no evaluation then, no real academic context to what I was doing, I just knew it worked. My approach at that time was difficult to categorise. My methods spread broadly across the range from arts to therapy, while their application is immediate and context specific. My work is also underpinned by structures and templates of understanding that are familiar to the men with whom I worked.

I would describe an ideal structure as ‘culturally competent, embracing cultural forms of creativity… validating those cultural forms as a viable form of expression’. In co facilitators, he looks for those who are culturally competent in their own spheres. In order to create a safe space in which transformation can occur, they need to be able to build credibility through shared humour and their real, lived, common experiences. As Chris Johnston has pointed out, structure is not value free. Although my work is based on shared societal and cultural values, they reflect my personal values too. I favour using traditional wisdom, for example, as a basis for Interpretation of reality. The Sankofa bird, after which my company is named, is an African bird with its head facing backwards. It symbolises going back and retrieving,’ So I go back and search for wisdom and bring that as the foundation for interpreting social reality’.

I see the creative process as part of a wider developmental process concerned with rites of passage. I have developed a range of projects around fatherhood, masculinity and rites of passage using black history and performance as the tool. I also use African-centred performance, not in its purest sense but rather in terms of favouring the non-linear tradition, the aural tradition and ritualised performance. So I use the creative process to engage them in a process of self-definition, outside of their social label.’

As a part of doing this, I create notions of ritual that involves sitting in a circle with a stone in the centre. Each person picks the stone up in the morning and affirms something they would like to get from that day. Every evening, they repeat the process, stating what it was that they received. The stone is said to contain memory, and so they may dedicate thoughts or actions through the stone to people who are not there. They may go into the centre of the circle and pray. The ritual is about finding what works the best for them, about establishing meaning and purpose in their days and lives. In conclusion, my work now interweaves the personal and political concerns specific to black men informed by my understanding of criminology, psychology and creative processess.’

Tuesday 10 August 2010

Why is this trip important? (www.wcmt.org.uk)

Why is this trip important? This is a recurring question in my mind. At the age of 53, I am living in a community in crisis; I desire to have an easier life, as well as nursing an inner need to come off the treadmill (that has become the way most of us live now). Quite simply being in mid-life kick starts the process of personal reclamation by being propelled less by the need for status but more one of purpose. Applying for and being awarded the Fellowship, organising the schedule, and preparing for this trip has at times been tiring, hard to switch off from, incredibly time consuming, but exhilarating at the same time. On both a personal and professional level I have struggled with many aspects of my own development as a man, based on never having experienced positive fathering from my natural father. Needless to say he was absent in my life only to appear in my 30’s and then drop out of my life again due to his premature death. So I only met him 3 times in my whole life. This is not an academic position, but one rooted in experiencing a constant sense of loss at never having known what it was like to have that significant man in your life for birthdays, trips, schooling, or important conversations.

This has had a knock on effect in terms of my own parenting. Fatherless, father deficit, or the hunger of that most significant male figure in your life leaves many of us with a void that cries out to be filled, but seldom happens. For many men the inability to share thoughts, be listened to, or to feel understood, generates the kind of internal oppression that all too often leads to isolation and withdrawal. This can and does develop internal negative perceptions of ‘self’. For some men this ‘absence of being’ is made worse by being held captive inside a system that despite its claim to enable the restoration of purpose it still leans heavily towards punishment as a deterrent to problems created through socio-historical reasons. Hence prison, church, and community are held captive to a problematic process of rehabilitating young men, who find solace in the confine of the extended family network defined as a gang.

Deep down I’m dissatisfied with the current state of things and feel the need to create some new levels of understanding around notions of the ‘male condition’ as a consequence of father’s absence, as well as giving voice for those of us who have been impacted by something that was not of our making. I want us to go from coping to survival, survival to liberation. As the National Trust for the Development of African American Men, cite in their logo “From Liability to An Asset “… it is possible to make more responsible men, better fathers, stronger sons, which in itself makes the community a better place to inhabit. Such a process is vital if we are to break the cycle of negative behaviour within families and communities.” By embracing a new journey in my life, I am hoping other men will be encouraged to find new purpose and experience personal growth. I offer this poem for those reading my blog who are in a similar place as me. Without atonement there can be no redemption. I do not blame my fathers absence for all the things that have gone wrong in my life, but I have carried the burden of his mistakes for too long now. It is time to let them go. Baltimore has provided me with the space to begin a new journey.


Crossroads

Lost in the abyss ..... was stuck behind the door
Drowning in self-pity ... ‘N’ emotionally poor
Going thru’ a re-birth with a spiritual placenta
I’m arriving at the crossroads .... the sign outside says enter
Like a broken jigsaw .... I am on the mend
This struggle cannot continue ... my struggle has to end
I am at the crossroads ...
Need to change the pattern ‘N’ make some different choices
Tired of the cracked record .... need to hear some different voices
Know it’s time to reclaim myself .... my broken wings must fly
Know it’s time to climb the mountain .... no more asking why?
I am at the crossroads ‘n’ feeling overjoyed
Transition .. transformation .. then the filling of the void
I am at the crossroads ...
Know I have shed a skin ‘N’ accept that I have now grown
Know this phoenix has risen ‘N’ a new seed has been sown
Love shouts very loudly .. calling out my name
Cannot push it back anymore ... coz I understand the gain
I’m walking past the crossroads .... I’m excited as I enter
Spirit wraps its arms around me .. I am glad that God has sent her
I am at the crossroads
As the light shines thru’ the darkness .. I can now see clear
Once there was pure darkness ... now there is less fear
Life’s no longer a mystery ... I understand the plot
Wisdom holds me gently .. teaches me what is from what’s not
No longer at the crossroads .. the threshold has been breached
But the journey will continue ... until the destination has been reached
No longer at the crossroads ...

Monday 9 August 2010

Counting the time (www.wcmt.org.uk)

Counting down the days before my departure to Baltimore as part of my Winston Churchill Travel Fellowship. I'm nearly packed, contacts have been made, and am just waiting to go. It feels like a long time coming. I've been working for many years in prisons, schools, and community. Now I'm going to do some field research in the US, with the prospect of a new future. I owe a debt of gratitude to the Winston Churchill Trust for making it all possible. I look forward to sharing the events as they unfold. The overall objective of my trip is to look at models of good practice where addressing fatherlessness, father hunger, and father deficit amongst young men has created stronger communities.